A Weird And Wet Date :-)

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My friend M. called last night.  Like me, she belongs to the ever growing club of women who are just slightly over 29…  :-), single and happy.  Unlike me, who has given up on dating altogether, until that special person comes around the corner (and I know it when I see him…  🙂  ), she’s still trying… and sharing her weird dating experiences with me…

For the second time now, she fell into the trap of a well meaning friend telling her, “I know this really nice guy, he would be perfect for you.  You ought to go out on a date… ”  After her last experience with that particular  ‘really nice guy,’  she told me, it would definitely be quite some time until she listened to any friends again. Well, here we are, just a few weeks later…

Mr. Nice Guy turned out to be a bit of a crazy…  In their very first phone conversation, he joked with her,  “The last time I was in a woman, was two years ago, when visiting the  ‘Statue of Liberty,’ “… haha…  Okay, I have a good sense of humor, and if you know somebody a little better, and are convinced that the person would think that to be funny as well, okay…  But in the first few minutes of a phone conversation with a woman you have never even met?…  Not particularly appropriate…  🙂

When she told me about it, I felt her hesitating already, even going on the date. And as a friend, I just told her to be careful and to watch out for any more red flags.  So, I guess, curiosity got the best of her, and she went on the date, which ended up ordering in Thai food while sipping on a glass of wine in his condo.  It didn’t take but a few minutes, she may have still been enjoying the spicy food, when Mr. Statue of Liberty decided to spice things up himself, and basically threw himself at her, trying to kiss her.  That attempt ended up licking her entire face, ears and neck.  I could hear in her voice that she didn’t particularly care for all that wet attention…  :-).  Naturally, I asked her, if she had told him, that she had already taken a shower that day, so no need for him to lick her clean…  🙂

Anyway, after another few minutes of him telling her that he thought they’d be married within a year, she decided, it was time to leave… and you guessed it… take a shower…  🙂

Now my question is…  I can see that licking can be a very erotic part of making love, something I certainly enjoy… :-), but on the first date… after a few minutes… all over your face… ???  Do men really believe that to be a turn on?  I guess, some woman at some point may have told him that she liked it, and now he thinks every woman likes it, and may have decided to introduce himself that way… I don’t know…  🙂

Oh, you guessed it…  No second date for Mr. Nice Guy…  I guess, he’ll have to visit the  ‘Statue of Liberty’  again…  🙂

I still know why I’m not dating…  🙂

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17 Comments »

  1. Davis said

    most of us (men) wouldn’t dare try such a thing — would we?

  2. @ Davis:

    Well……. No comment…lol…lol

    Have a good one!

    Andrea

  3. Hmm..not all guys are the same…but the story is not far from reality.

  4. swissknifev said

    There are guys who think they are 1-second lady killers. They also don’t realize that one man’s idea of delicious meat is another woman’s carrion. What I’m surprised about is why didn’t your friend send him back with a swollen nose and a deflated head? Anyway the poor guy’s only trip inside a woman was the Statue of Liberty and that explains his desperation. Statue of Liberty hardly needs his licking because she’s got plenty of water all around her. And his licking sprees seem to liberate his dates from further torture chambers of more imaginative formulas – post the first date bliss.Probably he’s trying his licking-magic on every date and getting kicked to the next one. Probably he’s kind of playing some Russian roulette hoping that a bullet can successfully lick the dust.

    Anyway the lesson that we can learn is: Know your lady’s taste before you serve your delicious and mouthwatering lickings.

    Have a nice day.

  5. @ Chat Lines:

    Not all men are the same… I completely agree… But maybe the weird ones give the not-so-weird a bad reputation… 🙂

    Have a beautiful day!

    Andrea

  6. @ swissknifev:

    …. or just simply act normal… how about that? Maybe you’ll get to a second date, and don’t have to visit the ‘Statue of Liberty’ again… lol…lol… Just a thought… 🙂

    Have a wonderful day!

    Andrea

  7. swissknifev said

    I take your point. i act absolute;y myself with women. No showing off. What’s the point in showing off if it is not true? And IF it is true then why show off? In all my relationships or interactions with women I make sure that I treat them like human beings. I also found that honesty, respect, sincerity and integrity makes you an instant friend with women. Once people asked me how is that I have so many girl and women friends. They thought there was some big deal about. I told them that all they have to do is put themselves in her place and remember Charles Dickens quote: Do unto others what you want them to do unto you.
    AND – deep down all women are moms – they care – if a guy can command that care.

    Am I wrong Andrea? If I wrong tell me so so that I don’t bungle. I’ll take your advice seriously. Especially that you are a beautiful woman – and what does a beautiful woman think?

  8. swissknifev said

    Who’s that idiot who can’t … may be he didn’t notice

    Idiot! Say hello at least you a– She’s a lady

    But asses can’t say a good thing to a lady so they are …

    Next time a guy acts macho say this

    ” Goergy porgy pudding and pie
    teased the girls and made them cry
    when the boys came out to play
    Goergy porgy ran away…

    most guys are like that.

    I am soft towards women and criminal towards guys… DON

  9. swissknifev said

    You are busy with you book. Tell me when it’s ready. OK ? small guy but…

  10. @swissknifev: I will let you know… And I’m sure you’ll enjoy reading it… 🙂

    Have a good one!

    Andrea

  11. It AMAZES me how grown people, who have obviously interacted with humans their entire life, can be so immune to body language!

    I am a 44 year old, married guy. When I was dating many years ago, I NEVER swung at the ball unless I knew I was going to hit it! I mean, come on…don’t we observe clues in a persons eyes, body position, giggle, or smile? Doesn’t any guy try a simple touch on the arm to sense a woman’s energy prior to kissing her anymore?

    I just don’t get it. (Well actually I got plenty of it and now, my wife and I can sense our energy, mood and desires without speaking or even being in the same city!) makeyourwifehot.com

  12. I’m like yourself and your friend, very single. We learned in fairytales that we would have to kiss a few frogs before finding our “prince charming.” I’ve gone on a couple dates as well with weirdos that made me prefer to kiss a toad than my date. It’s stories like this that truly make me appreciate being single. Great and hilarious story.

  13. @makeyourwifehot: Looking at body language is certainly a good start, if you’re looking for a second date… lol…lol

    Have a beautiful day!

    Andrea

  14. @dancefloordiva: Looks like we belong to the same club… Single and Happy…lol…lol… More power to you, girlfriend… 🙂

    Glad you liked my other post ‘Health Care Reform? YOU WILL DIE !!! Serious and important subject right now…

    Wishing you a beautiful day!

    Andrea

  15. swissknifev said

    Hi Andrea and howz yur book going? Take care.

  16. @swissknifev: Hi there! Hope life is good to you. Well, I’m still working on the book, seems to be a never ending story… lol… lol. But I will let you know when I’m finished… 🙂

    Have a beautiful day!

    Andrea

  17. swissknifev said

    Hi! Nice hearing from you. Once, someone asked me to write a novel. They could have as well asked me to handle a space trekking star ship like the ones you find in movies like Star Wars.. Phew! A book sounds tough. So I can imagine the kind of hard work you’re putting in. If I write a 1000 words I’ll feel like Shakespeare.

    Have a great day.

    Vijay

    My name is Vijay. I think swissknife sounds too bloggish and masked.

    So Andrea, this is Vijay the human. Nothing like a Swissknife. Just two legs, two hands and a face that’ll do a clown proud.

    🙂

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